Just Taking It Day by Day

I am really getting anxious. My chart for TTC is looking really good. But I am nervous that it will all come crashing down here in a day or two (possibly even today!) Each month that I have AF come, just tears me up. I remember with Carli it took us 3 months of actual trying. That is the point we are at now. It drove me nuts then too, but this time around it all seems so different. Maybe it is because I now know that there is always the real possibility of not bringing home a baby. I dont know....I just am ready for it to happen!!! I have little signs that I never realized that happen each month. I always seem to get really irritable right before I start...and all though this seems to be TMI, I always seem to be a little gassy too. I went back and looked at my last months chart....and I show that I was irritable the same day of my cycle last month that I was this month....7 DPO. Damn!!! With the gassy part though, I am a little farther behind on it...but now that I know it happens, I hate it!!! And I know that Fertility Friend tells you to wait until the test date...but I got a + HPT with Carli at 9 DPO. Therefore...I usually start testing that day. Just once a day, with first morning urine. So far, yesterday and todays test have both been negative....such a bummer. Oh well....just gotta keep going with my saying...."What happens.....happens!!"

I thought of another little quirky thing. I was thinking of my kids due dates....Mikaela was due Aug 4th, Carter was due June 27th, Keaton was due May 4th, and Carli was due April 4th. Projected due date if this is the cycle is March 27th. I just thought that was interesting...crazy huh?

On a good note...I get to go scrapping again today!! Chelsea, one of my brother's, Dustin, girlfriend and I went for about an hour and a half on Friday. Just enough to make us crave more. So we are heading back to our favorite little scrapbooking store, Scrappers, today. The last time we actually scrapped was March 2006. We went on a little weekend excursion. Little did we know that it was a really religious scrapbook event. I usually need music to help keep me motivated. Well, the played music alright...but it was churchy music. Really, I dont have a problem with that...but I really wasnt expecting that. Needless to say...it sucked the motivation out of both of us! I did get a few pages done...but not nearly enough to justify a 3 day weekend away scrappin. Chelsea and I got our first tattoos down in Wichita thou!! Those did make for a really cool 2 page layout!! We have been talking for a while about going scrapping again. Here 16 months later...we are finally doing it!! I am really hoping to get motivated again!! I have a ton of Carli's pictures to scrap, but seem to be at a loss as what to do with all of them....Maybe I will just make some cards to get me going!!